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Odds 'n' sods

Getting straight into it: Much loved father-in-law has been extremely ill for some time. He's fought the odds and,thanks to the NHS (with some reservations), is still alive and kicking, no sign of dementia despite the terrifying delusions brought on by an additional kidney disease, so I'm cautiously optimistic he'll make Xmas and maybe even his 88th birthday next November.

I know he'll go eventually but anyone in the same position will understand our reluctance to say bye. *hugs to you*

Other subject: I've just watched the brilliant Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers musical, Swing Time and was pleased that the Beeb didn't cut the black-face 'Bojangles of Harlem' number.

It was a jolt to see something so retro, and possibly offensive, but it needs to be contexualised. It was a tribute to Bill 'Bojangles' Robinson, the fine African-American tap dancer, and also to one of Freddy's dancing instructors, the superb African-American John W. Bubbles (Michael Jackson named his chimp after that alias, weirdly), real name John William Sublett. John Sublett is widely considered, by those who know, to be the finest tap dancer of his generation.

It's worth mentioning that he was also an admirer of his pupil, who he thought was the best all-round dancer of the time.

During the routine, Freddy was dressed as Sportin' Life, a character in the marvellous Porgy and Bess, written by George Gershwin, who chose John Sublett for the role. Bit of a giveaway, Freddy. *g*


( 58 comments — Leave a comment )
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:19 pm (UTC)
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:27 pm (UTC)

Hope you're well, hon.
(no subject) - sweet_exile - Oct. 29th, 2011 02:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - kitty_poker1 - Oct. 29th, 2011 02:39 pm (UTC) - Expand
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:20 pm (UTC)
Good news about your father-in-law.
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:30 pm (UTC)
Thanks, love. He's an impeccable father-in-law, never interfering but always supportive. The last of our parents and we want to hang on to him. :)
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:26 pm (UTC)
Hugs back.

Six months after my dad died of an unexpected stroke, my mom was diagnosed with the early stages of Alzheimer's. In retrospect, she had been showing signs of dementia for at least a couple of years before that but as she and my dad had been mostly independent, and my dad wasn't very communicative about what was going on, my brother and I had no idea. She's been living with me for the last 15 months and every day is a blessing and a source of stress at the same time.
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:36 pm (UTC)
I understand. Physical problems are hard enough to deal with, but dementia/Alzheimer's is whole new set of problems.

Don't feel badly about feeling stressed and annoyed and at the end of your tether. Call for help from the NHS or other family and friends whenever you need it. Respite care is available if you ask.

I only had a taste of it because Dad's mind returned once his kidney disease was sorted, but it was so frightening.
(no subject) - a_boleyn - Oct. 29th, 2011 02:45 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - kitty_poker1 - Oct. 29th, 2011 02:55 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - a_boleyn - Oct. 29th, 2011 02:57 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - kitty_poker1 - Oct. 29th, 2011 02:58 pm (UTC) - Expand
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:32 pm (UTC)
Good to to see you galloping around LJ again, *neigh*bour!
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:46 pm (UTC)
LOL! Nice pun. :p
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:41 pm (UTC)
Nice to "see" you again.

My 85-year-old father has been having serious health problems but also thanks to the NHS (with a few reservations) he's home now. Best wishes for your father-in-law's continued recovery.
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:48 pm (UTC)
Thank you, and to your father. We have to steel ourselves to lose them eventually, but we love them and want it to be well down the line. :)
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:51 pm (UTC)
*hugs you hard*
Take care of yourself, too, hon.
Oct. 29th, 2011 02:57 pm (UTC)
*hugs you back*

Thank you, love. We're lucky in many ways, but it's a bit stressful.
Oct. 29th, 2011 03:44 pm (UTC)
HI! Good news about your father-in-law. Glad you updated. Been thinking about you. ♥
Oct. 31st, 2011 04:51 pm (UTC)
Been thinking about you too. ♥

Not long after posting this, Dad fell and was carted off to hospital again. After treatment for cuts to the head, he's now back home. We didn't know whether to laugh or cry when it turned out he'd overbalanced after a Scotch or two too many. ;)
Oct. 29th, 2011 03:46 pm (UTC)

*glomps you!*

Lovely to see you - hope things continue to be better than they've been.

Oct. 31st, 2011 04:52 pm (UTC)

Thank you, and great to see you too! As I told Kerry above, he's still causing minor mayhem but at least he's still alive and kicking. *g*
Oct. 29th, 2011 03:48 pm (UTC)
*hugs*. So glad he's doing better. Know you've been worried.
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:08 pm (UTC)
*hugs back* Thanks, hon. We've been very worried, and dread the late night phone calls which are part and parcel of having a frail elderly relative. Good job he's in a sheltered flat and isn't shy about pressing the panic button if he's in trouble. :)
Oct. 29th, 2011 03:58 pm (UTC)
Hello love. I've was just thinking about you last week and wondering how you were doing. I've been meaning to drop you a line for ages, and never seemed to quite get around to it, so huge apologies for that.

I'm glad that your father-in-law is on the mend. It's such a stressful time, but I'm so happy you have all come out the other end of it, for now.

You must remember to take care of yourself through times like that.

Much love and hugs to you
s xxx
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:12 pm (UTC)
Hi sweetie. :) Don't apologise; I'm very bad at communicating when things are going badly, better at retreating then resurfacing when they improve.

Paul and I are supprting one another, as well as Dad, and the three of us have become closer so there's a positive.

Much love and many hugs back,

Oct. 29th, 2011 05:03 pm (UTC)
Hi! hihihi! *hugs*
I'm glad to hear your FIL is doing better!

I know he'll go eventually but anyone in the same position will understand our reluctance to say bye.
Yes. I completely understand that.
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:13 pm (UTC)
Hihihi! *hugs back*

Yes. I completely understand that.

Thanks, love. You've been through your own troubles, so I knew you would.
Oct. 29th, 2011 06:38 pm (UTC)
{{{hugs and smishes and smooches}}}

I'm glad he's recovering. Hope you both are well! ♥
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:17 pm (UTC)
*huggles and smoochies*

Paul and I are rather stressed but coping without taking it out on one another, which is probably the best we can hope for. *g*

As I told Kerry above, there was another crisis shortly after I posted, but it's been dealt with. We just have to convince Dad that he's not 50 any more and one small Scotch a night is enough! He shares your taste for a nice one. ;)
Oct. 29th, 2011 07:07 pm (UTC)
Hey, hi!
I'm sorry to hear your FIL has been in poor health, but that he's still holding his own.
*good thoughts to you all*

I did not know that about the blackface in that movie - it's a good thing to read. It lessens the recoil factor that you pretty much automatically feel to know it was done from a place of respect and admiration, rather than mockery. Thanks for the info!
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:30 pm (UTC)

Yep, still holding his own and his ability to rebound and independent spirit are awesome. Thanks so much for the good thoughts. :)

Exactly. I automatically recoiled when the routine started even though I knew the history and that, rather than mocking or patronising, Astaire was expressing his admiration for, and gratitude to, two great artists. It's widely believed that he invited John Sublett into the rehearsal hall and that he approved the routine.
(no subject) - tabaqui - Oct. 31st, 2011 08:41 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - kitty_poker1 - Oct. 31st, 2011 10:10 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - tabaqui - Oct. 31st, 2011 10:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
Oct. 29th, 2011 08:52 pm (UTC)
*hugs and loves you*

You know I am rooting for your beloved Father-in-law to be around for a good, long, and healthy time.

I agree - it's important to look at things in context and not to censor things just because they do not coincide with modern sensibilities.

Oct. 31st, 2011 05:33 pm (UTC)
*hugs and loves you back*

Thank you so much, my dear! We had another blip not long after I posted but, once again, Dad has confounded expectations. Stubborn old git. *g*

Precisely. History shouldn't be rewritten but the good embraced, even if it doesn't fit with 'modern' ideas, and the bad used as an object lesson so it won't be repeated.
Oct. 29th, 2011 09:49 pm (UTC)
I understand completely about your FiL. I hope he continues to be stable.

I love Swing Time! I can't say how many times I've seen it over the years. So sublime.
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:34 pm (UTC)
Not entirely stable, but still with us. *g*

I love it too! That and Top Hat are probably my two favourite musicals of Hollywood's Golden Years. *happy sigh*
(no subject) - a2zmom - Oct. 31st, 2011 05:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - kitty_poker1 - Oct. 31st, 2011 06:24 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - a2zmom - Oct. 31st, 2011 06:53 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - kitty_poker1 - Oct. 31st, 2011 07:15 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - a2zmom - Oct. 31st, 2011 07:35 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - kitty_poker1 - Oct. 31st, 2011 07:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
Oct. 30th, 2011 10:00 am (UTC)
*hugs* So very glad you hear Dad is doing well. He's a tough ol' thing!
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:40 pm (UTC)
*huggles* Thanks, honeybunch. He really is! Still won't accept a carer, still wants to do his own cooking and cleaning. I swear he'd try to put up new wallpaper if we didn't stop him. *g*
Oct. 30th, 2011 10:56 am (UTC)
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:41 pm (UTC)
Oct. 30th, 2011 01:29 pm (UTC)
Glad your fil is not so bad, when you think he could live to be 100 or over then he's no age! S'long as he's right in his mind like you say.
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:45 pm (UTC)
You're right! He's already the longest lived member of his family and there's no history of dementia so he could carry on for a few years to come. As long as his quality of life remains high, we'll all keep fighting.
Oct. 31st, 2011 02:22 am (UTC)

It's been such a long time since I saw a post from you here. I'm so glad to hear your voice.

I'm so sorry about your dad in law's waning health.
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:48 pm (UTC)
*hugs back*

Thanks, Lorraine. It's been like coming home. :)

We're staying positive. As long as he has a good quality of life, we'll do everything to keep him as well as possible. If it drops too far, it'd be cruel to want him to carry on. So far, he's totally 'with-it', still interested in life and capable of caring for himself so we'll see how it goes.
(no subject) - lunabee34 - Nov. 1st, 2011 12:46 am (UTC) - Expand
Oct. 31st, 2011 04:09 am (UTC)
Glad you're doing okay, it's really great to hear from you, and fully understand your reluctance to let go. Hope you have him around for a long time yet.
Oct. 31st, 2011 05:52 pm (UTC)
Thank you! The worst is going to happen one day, obviously, but he's still enjoying life and he's too stubborn to let go before he absolutely has to. Thumbs up, the lovely old boy.

Hope you're well. :)
(no subject) - laazikaat - Nov. 1st, 2011 10:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
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